“When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain,

you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed

very Thingish inside you is quite different

when it gets out into the open

and has other people looking at it.”

                       —A. A. Milne

are you stuck?

 

We all get stuck at some point. And there are a million ways and reasons you might be stuck. But when being stuck is a chronic state of being, it’s time to intervene.

 

We are all born perfect little beings – absolutely pure, absolutely simple. But from the very moment we are born (and some would argue even before we are born), life begins to influence us. Researchers are now proving that our experiences — good and bad — and the associations we connect to them, are stored within us like a library. Based on those experiences, we adjust accordingly (physically, emotionally, and cognitively both consciously and unconsciously) to create a sense of safety in the world. Millions of tiny adjustments we make along the way serve to create our sense of self — how we perceive ourselves in the world and how others perceive us. This is our foundation.

 

Our bodies have this very cool built-in system that is meant to process difficult events quickly. That system can save our lives. But when that system is twarted before having the opportunity to process in a healthy way, memories are fragmented and are stored deep in the library of our implicit memory system. We don't even know they're there! We may develop thoughts, behaviors and beliefs about ourselves and the world around us based on messages from those stored memories. And while they may have served to protect us at one time, often the resulting thoughts, behaviors and beliefs become maladaptive. They cause us to become "stuck" in ways that prevent us from living our perfect life.

 

Traditional therapy seeks to identify the problem (the experience) in order to work through it. But we now know that having an intellectual understanding of the root of that stuckness (“what happened to me, when and why?”) does not always provide the required release of the energy that is stored in our bodies in a very biological way. We believe we've “done the work,” but things don't seem to be getting any better.

Our work together is about going beyond that intellectual and emotional understanding to unlock what is stuck and heal the wounds that prevent us from living our most ideal life.

 

It's never too late. Let's do it together.

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© 2019 BOBBI JANKOVICH, LMFT

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